Mulaney: The New Seinfeld?

In the late 80's and early 90's, it seemed every comedian had their own sitcom. Most were simply "based on the comedy" of the main character, putting the star in situations that provided the best situation in each episode. Whether it was Roseanne, or Home Improvement, The Cosby Show, or Everybody Loves Raymond, the comedian was never a comedian on the series. Except, of course, on Seinfeld, probably the most successful and influential of them all.

Since the "show about nothing," several stand-ups have followed in their footsteps with series that followed a version of their lives in comedy. Curb and Louie come to mind, but the format has strayed from the milti-camera, laugh track days of Seinfeld. Until now. Twenty-five years after Seinfeld debuted, Fox is trying to make history repeat itself with an obvious homage to the ground-breaking NBC sitcom. So, what's the deal with Mulaney? Sadly, the great material at the heart of the throwback comedy can't save it from feeling out of time. Believe me, we all know how important timing is for comedy.

Part of Fox's new Sunday Funday lineup, Mulaney follows an up-and-coming New York stand up comedian named John Mulaney. His roommates include an uptight personal trainer named Jane, played by formerr SNL cast member Nasim Pedrad, and Seaton Smith as Motif, another struggling but working comic. Another veteran of Saturday Night Live, Martin Short stars as Mulaney's new boss, a self-absorbed comic legend turned game show host named Lou Cannon. Also in the cast are Zach Pearlman, who plays trust-fund baby/drug dealer/punching bag Andre, and Academy Award nominee Elliott Gould, who is the elderly Jewish stoner neighbor named Oscar.

The main problem for any throwback is to avoid feeling dated, and Mulaney suffers by not adding a new spin on the old formula. It is Seinfeld all the way down to the stand-up sequences and noise between transitions. I promised myself I wouldn't mention Seinfeld in this entry, but that's nearly impossible. Even the sitcom itself calls Mulaney (the character) a 'Seinfeld ripoff' in the much improved fourth episode, titled "Sweet Jane," that dramatizes his bit about the impossibility of forcing girls to be friends.

The good news is that the Fox series does get better with each installment. the bad news is that the pilot is terrible, so getting worse was practically an impossibility. None of this is good for me because I'm a fan of Mulaney's work, the stuff he wrote for SNL (including Stefon and his two Weekend Update appearances), his stand-up bits with Nick Kroll on Kroll Show. He's funny, but his show is not good and I don't know why. The pilot got no laughs out of me and that's not good for a comedy.

Perhaps having seen some of the material before cause some would-be laughs to become smiles? I'm willing to admit that maybe Mulaney doesn't feel fresh to me because I've already heard the jokes and not because of the well-worn format. However, I don't think that's the case. I like the cast, and the show does improve with every episode (I've seen five), just not enough to recommend when there's so much more to watch on Sunday nights.

Top 10 Rock Drummers

These guys rocked to the beat of a different drum. Welcome to Kiker's Blog, and today I'm listing my top 10 rock drummers. For this list I chose standout drummers who were the perfect mix of technical talent, popularity, and who proved themselves essential to the music of the bands they were in. I'm excluding drummers from genres such as heavy metal, hip hop, and jazz.

10. Phil Collins-Genesis
As Genesis evolved from progressive to pop rock, Collins showcased a strong musicality and versatility on the drums. Audiences were also impressed with his rare talent of singing and drumming simultaneously. Though he played jazz fusion, folk, and blues in other projects, it was as a solo artist that Collins found further success; with the gated reverb of In The Air Tonight shaping much of the 80's pop drum sound.

9. Nick Mason-Pink Floyd
Pink Floyd wouldn't have been the same without Mason, who was the only unchanging band member on all their records. Weather playing acoustic, or electronic drums, or even percussion, he knew how to bring everything together to complete the psychedelic and progressive rock sound. The proficient studio musician also also knew how to show off on stage as demonstrated by the band's heavy and extravagant live performances.

8. Ringo Starr-The Beatles
He may not have been the finest technical drummer ever, but his offbeat and creative style helped build The Beatles' sound we love. Despite being left-handed, Starr used a right-handed kit to keep the beat and ensured the tempo was just right. His crucial contributions showed that drummers can be just as important to songwriting as other band members, and influenced countless drummers from then on. 

7. Mitch Mitchell-The Jimi Hendrix Experience
Mitchell's session drumming including his time with The Who landed him a permanent spot in The Jimi Hendrix Experience's lineup. By fusing his Jazz influences with rock, he developed a rhythmic and melodic playing style that perfectly complimented the music. Mitchell's heavy beats, snare drum stroke patterns, rolls, and fills were also a source of creativity for Hendrix in studio and on stage.

6. Ginger Baker-Cream
Cream's blues and psychedelic rock would've been very different without Baker's flashy jazz inspired drums. While in the group, the drummer broke new ground by using double bass drums and playing lengthy solos. Baker continued to find success with his world music after the breakup of Cream, but it was his booming 60's style that set the stage for today's heavy metal drummers.

5. Stewart Copeland-The Police
He helped craft The Police's new wave mix of punk, reggae, and jazz by incorporating those styles with his rock and Middle Eastern influences. Known for using accented beats and splash cymbals, he had a highly defined and innovative technique and had a nack for enhancing songs with groove.

4. Dave Grohl-Nirvana, Queens of the Stone Age, Them Crooked Vultures
He's best known as the frontman for Foo Fighters, but this multi-instrumentalist first made waves by hitting hard and fast in several bands. It was his fierce and intense drumming in Nirvana that cemented Grohl's place in grunge. The nicest guy in rock further flaunted his passion for drums by lending his passion for drums by lending his talents to Queens of the Stone Age, Them Crooked Vultures, and many more. 

3. Keith Moon-The Who
Moon lived life as wildly as he played the drums. Knowing his time was cut short, his ingenious and frenzy drumming lived on. With an intense and sensational style, Moon epitomized sex, drugs, and rock and roll. He also proved fundamental to The Who's sound with his back beats and double bass drum playing. He often stole the spotlight with his explosive antics. 

2. John Bonham-Led Zeppelin
Thanks to his speed, heavy drumsticks, powerful arms and rapid right foot, Bonham's thunderous bass drum was unlike anything anyone had ever seen. His talent for finding the groove and mighty drum solos helped forge Led Zeppelin's original and unforgettable blend of hard rock, blues, and folk. Despite his short life, Bonham's style remains unmatched and fans, critics, and musicians alike continue to crown him one of the all time greatest drummers.

Honorable Mentions:

Tré Cool-Green Day

Mike Portnoy-Dream Theater

Phil Rudd-AC/DC

Chad Smith-Red Hot Chili Peppers 

1. Neil Peart-Rush
From hard rock to jazz then to progressive rock, Peart could play it all and he could play it well. The Award winning drummer distinguished himself with his unconventional time signatures and unique rhythmic styles, but also displayed extreme endurance by playing extensive live solos on massive drum kits. Respected for his technical experience, he is known for reversing his drum sticks to make heavier sounds.

Breaking Bad

WARNING: The following blog entry contains spoilers

In a world where TV has replaced movies as a medium for adult entertainment comes the best HBO style drama (that can't use the F word or show any boobs, yet it's so good) that finally made TV fanatics shut up about The Wire: Breaking Bad. Breaking Bad is literally the greatest TV series I have ever watched. The show is so powerful I binge watch it on Netflix, so all-consuming I push it on my friends even if they don;t watch TV, and so addicting I can't shut up about it; it's basically like drugs.

Premise: Set in scenic New Mexico (because state tax laws make it cheaper to shoot there than Los Angeles), chemistry teacher Walter White has been diagnosed with the kind of cancer that makes him cough...a lot. Walt teams up with his junkie former student to cook crystal meth. He cooks and sells meth to pay for his expensive cancer treatments, then to save money for his family's future, and then just because he loves it. His partner Jesse Pinkman: a junkie who prefers the formal term for female dog. Together they battle the baddest villains in television history (all of whom happen to be angry Latino men). Walt also has trouble at home: there's his annoying wife Skylar. At first I wished she would just go away, then I wished she could just get away because it just so happens she's married to a complete sociopath. There's also a baby named Holly...who only shows up when it's convenient. His son Walter Jr. who...I don't know if I can make fun of him. And a brother-in-law DEA agent who's terrible at telling jokes, and is even worse at noticing his family is running a crystal meth empire.

If you haven't seen this show: prepare yourself for five epic seasons of awesome, unforgettable moments. Such as explosions, a dead corpse dissolved through a bathtub, and intense dialogue. However, like any other AMC drama there's a lot of boring moments. It takes a while to pay off, but the intensity of the story makes it totally worth it. This is a show where anyone can be killed at any time and in any way: from box cutter, to bike lock, to ATM machine, to decapitated head turtle bomb, to exploding grandpa, to overdosing on heroin, do AED machine, to Pontiac Aztec (now that's product placement!).

Running gags: Breakfast, POV shots, Marie always wearing purple, bald guys, foreshadowing, magnets, rocks (sorry, minerals)

Starring: Bryan Cranston (Malcolm's dad from Malcolm in the Middle), Anna Gunn, Aaron Paul (the guy who won a desk on the price is right), Dean Norris (this guy always plays a cop), RJ Mitte (his disability made him famous), Bob Odenkirk (half of Mr. Show)

Seriously, if you haven't started watching this show, you better start ASAP.

Top 10 Rock Bassists

They know how to slap the bass. Welcome to Kiker's Blog and today I'm listing my top 10 rock bassists. For this list, I'm focusing on bassists who are innovative, great songwriters, or standout bassists with a commercially successful track record. I'm focusing less on session players and technical masterminds.

10. John Myung-Dream Theater
As one of the progressive metal group's founders and longest serving members, John Myung has helped shape Dream Theater's sound since day one. His highly technical style includes the use of finger picking, slapping, popping, and tapping. He's also distinguished himself by playing a 6 string bass which produces such complex and harmonious sounds, and are the core of the band's sounds.

9. John Deacon-Queen
Though he later played other instruments, it was his incredible bass playing that gave him the job with Queen when he was just 19. In addition to writing several Queen hits, John Deacon provided the unmistakable bass riff for their biggest American hit: Another One Bites The Dust. Known for using the instrument for playing both lead and rhythm, Deacon's proficiency was expressed through his bass runs and swift transitions.

8. Steve Harris-Iron Maiden
While he founded Iron Maiden and is the band's primary songwriter, Steve Harris has made a name for himself for his ability to play the bass. Thanks to his bass lines, finger picking techniques, and unique tone, Harris has made the bass as inexplicable to the band's sound as the guitar. Notable tracks include Running Free, Wrathchild, and The Trooper.

7. Les Claypool-Primus
Since he does double duty as Primus' vocalist and bassist, its obvious that Les Claypool is multi talented. Influenced by Rush's Geddy Lee, Claypool became a master of slap bass and helped bring the original and funk fueled sounds of Primus into the mainstream. His bass playing style is notable for incorporating several effects: distortion, tapping, and Spanish inspired strumming.

6. John Entwistle-The Who
With a nickname like thunder fingers, is it any surprise John Entwistle's skills on the four string bass are so highly regarded? The British musician used his formal music training to develop a hard hitting style that made him a pioneer of playing the bass like a lead instrument. Though he knew when and how to unleash his power, he also knew when to hold back. His bass playing was perfect for The Who's sound.

5. Flea-Red Hot Chili Peppers
As co-founder, there's no question that Flea has been instrumental to the Red Hot Chili Peppers' success. Though he mixes up different musical genres, Flea's trademark is his slap bass style which is the foundation of the funky flavors in the chili peppers' sound. He's also experimented with popping techniques, aggressive punk rock playing, and melodic simplicity.

4. John Paul Jones-Led Zeppelin
He may be a milti instrumentalist, but John Paul Jones will always be remembered for his groundbreaking bass. Just check out his dynamic and melodic sound on Ramble On, and how his memorable sound drives Dazed and Confused. While he also came up with the main riff for Black Dog, it's Jones' chemistry with drummer John Bonham as Led Zeppelin's rhythm section that truly made music history.

3. Cliff Burton-Metallica
Though he only lived to contribute three Metallica albums, Cliff Burton still left us a memorable discography filled with his amazing bass playing. By using it more than a lead guitar than a backup rhythm instrument, the musician helped the ban d become one of thrash metal's big four. Their heavy early sound and technical skills certainly wouldn't be the same without him. Just check out Burton's playing on the instrumental Orion for proof.

2. Paul McCartney-The Beatles
Known as one of the Fab Four, there's simply no arguing Paul McCartney's success and musical talents. McCartney not only impacted Rock and Roll with his vocals and his songwriting partnership with the late John Lennon, but also with his creative and melodic bass playing. The versatile musician is also known for his ability to expertly connect chords together to make iconic and elegant bass lines.

Here are a few Honorable Mentions:

Tom Araya-Slayer

Jack Bruce-Cream

Geezer Butler-Black Sabbath

Mike Dirnt-Green Day

Jason Newsted-Metallica/Echobrain/Newsted

Robert Trujillo-Metallica

1. Geddy Lee-Rush
Topping my list is the singer/songwriter/bassist/keyboardist of the most advanced and technically sound band in the history of music. While Rush has proven their persistence, musicianship, and ambition multiple times, Geddy Lee is continually cited as one of the biggest influences on bassists everywhere. While his complex bass playing is already impressive, it's the fact that Lee sings, plays keyboards and plays bass that gives him the edge.

Agree? Who's your favorite bassist?

Top 10 Modern Day Filmmakers

They're behind some of the greatest films ever made. Welcome to Kiker's Blog and today I'm listing my top 10 modern day film directors. I'm listing directors that have found mega critical and commercial success in the last 25 years. Though their success doesn't have to be limited to this period. I'm basing my choices on a mix of director's popularity, and talent.

10. Peter Jackson
Known for: The Lord of the Rings trilogy
Though he did make movies in the 90's, his contribution to epic fantasy films alone merits his place on this list. The Lord of the Rings trilogy was a massive undertaking and a commercial smash. Bringing together hobbits, elves, wizards, dwarfs, and more with critics and fanatics. Jackson's epic adventure King Kong also won Oscars, but it's The Hobbit's box office triumph that cemented his place in pop culture.

9. Ang Lee
Known for: Brokeback Mountain, Life of Pi
This Taiwanese-American's work is so diverse, you don't always expect what he's going to do next. He's broken the laws of gravity, has had us see green in the Hulk, and has broken our hearts. Lee even managed the technically impossible by turning Life of Pi into a movie. What's remarkable is he's the first Asian to with the best director Oscar, Golden Globe, and BAFTA award.

8. David Fincher
Known for: Se7en, Fight Club, The Social Network, The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo
After the dark-styled Se7en, Fincher made Fight Club one of the most talked about films of the year despite disappointing box office numbers, and extreme violence. He then kept tensions high and brought to life the fantastic tale of a man who ages in reverse. Thanks to his visually exhilarating work and masterful storytelling, Fincher also thrilled us with an Oscar winning drama and mystery.

7. Christopher Nolan
Known for: Batman Begins, The Dark Night, Inception, The Dark Night Rises
Known for his neo-noir inspired style, modern look and dark themes, Nolan first played with our minds in psychological thrillers. However, audiences really took notice of the British filmmaker with his gritty Batman reboot which recharged the superhero and paved the way for one of the genre's finest. He's since the mesmerized us, turned dreams into reality, brought the dark knight out of retirement to the delight of the fans.

6. James Cameron
Known for: Alien, The Terminator, Terminator 2: Judgement Day, Titanic, Avatar
After establishing himself in the science fiction and action genres in the 80's, Cameron invaded pop culture with Terminator 2. However, it was his 1997 epic romantic disaster film that crowned him king of the world. Titanic won 11 Oscars and was the highest grossing movie ever. Over a decade later, Cameron broke that record with the groundbreaking 3D and computer generated movie Avatar.

5. Joel & Ethan Coen
Known for: Fargo, The Big Lebowski, No Country For Old Men, True Grit (2010)
The Coen brothers aren't just directors, they're also writers and producers. These brothers are well known for letting their wit and cleverness shine through; which sometimes leads to dark and twisted results. Weather it's an Oscar winning crime film like Fargo, a cult hit like The Big Lebowski, or a satirical comedy, While they've excelled especially in western inspired films, their black comedies have also been critically recognized. The Coens prove that two directors are better than one; they just need to work on their endings.

4. Clint Eastwood
Known for: Unforgiven, Million Dollar Baby, Letters From Iwo Jima, Gran Torino
He'll probably always be famous for his acting, but Eastwood's films excel in the same way when he's behind the camera. He's been directing films since the 70's, but came into his own during the last few decades winning best picture and director Oscars for Unforgiven, and Million Dollar Baby. His simple yet effective directing style has allowed him to explore many different genres and garner multiple accolades in recent years.

3. Quentin Tarantino
Known for: Reservoir Dogs, Pulp Fiction, Kill Bill, Inglourious Basterds, Django Unchained
Tarantino introduced us to the stylized violence, pop culture heavy references, and excessive cursing we've come to love and expect with his directorial debut: Reservoir Dogs. The director then planted the seeds for the growth of non-linear films with Pulp Fiction. With Kill Bill, he continued to showcase his pension for different movie genres and has since managed two of his most highest grossing films to date.

2. Martin Scorcese
Known for: Taxi Driver, Goodfellas, The Departed, The Wolf of Wall Street
Inspired by his Italian background and Roman Catholic upbringing, Scorcese crafted some of cinema's greatest. Also known for featuring themes of violence and crime, Scorcese found further success in the 90's with Goodfellas. After pushing his actors to use their dramatic acting abilities , he won his first best director Oscar for The Departed. He continues to produce critically acclaimed work today.

Honorable Mentions:

J.J. Abrams

Wes Anderson

Darren Aronofsky

Ron Howard

Gus Van Stant

Oliver Stone

1. Steven Spielberg
Known for: Jaws, E.T, Jurassic Park, Schindler's List, Saving Private Ryan, Lincoln
After setting the bar for the modern blockbuster in the 70's and 80's, Spielberg set box office record in the 90's. He also received critical and commercial acclaim after taking a more mature turn with epics like Schindler's List and Saving Private Ryan. Though he's been criticized for being too sappy, he continues to collect awards in the 21st century, has become a household name, and remains one of Hollywood's most recognizable and influential directors.

Top 10 Stanley Kubrick Films

He always brought originality to his art. Welcome to Kiker's blog, and today I'm listing my top 10 favorite Stanley Kubrick films.

10. Lolita (1962)
While many of Kubrick's films are book adaptations, Vladimir Nabokov's Lolita is one challenging story to bring from page to screen. Why? That pesky little detail about the middle aged man falling for a young girl and marrying her mother to get near her. By increasing Lolita's age ever so slightly, and employing a storytelling technique where in the end falls at the beginning, Kubrick attempted to lessen the controversy, and heighten the interest.

9. Eyes Wide Shut (1999)
This was Kubrick's final film before his death, and he considered it his greatest contribution to the art of cinema. In this erotic story of sex, relationships, and the occult, Kubrick demonstrates his perfectionism by taking taking control of each of the film's visual aspects. From props and wall color, to gorgeous masks. Employing a shooting style that underlines the bizarre story line, Kubrick's choices are purposeful, intense, and stunning.

8.Paths of Glory (1957)
An example of Kubrick's earlier work, this is one of the few war movies that doesn't glorify violence. Honest, short, and bleak, it adapts the story of French soldiers who are sacrificed to set an example, and assure the motivation of their fellow officers. With hard-hitting sentiment, trademark visual beauty, and realism, this film also features the emotionally raw performances from actors recruited by Kubrick himself.

7. Spartacus (1960)
Kubrick re-teamed with the legendary Kirk Douglas to create this award-winning historical drama. Though the director was unable to retain the same level of creative control he was accustomed to, Spartacus still proved to be a powerful film. with spectacular acting and action sequences. Also notable for its communist connections and its parallels to the American Civil Rights Movement, this epic features a climax scene that's been copied and quoted on multiple occasions.

6. Barry Lyndon (1975)
Like most of his films, this Kubrick period piece broke cinematic ground with new techniques. In this case he made the unusual move to use only candles to light some scenes. Labeled by Roger Ebert as one of the most beautiful films ever made, it follows the story of a fictitious 18th century Irish social climber. A Kubrick vehicle in every sense, it's detached, beautiful, and a technical marvel.

5. The Shining (1980)
While avid Steven King fans may have been left unsatisfied, this Kubrick adaptation is now considered one of the great horror films. With a spooky Jack Nicholson performance as its anchor, it tracks a recovering alcoholic writer's downward spiral as he spends the winter held up in a haunted hotel. With shot after beautifully composed shot complimented by Kubrick's iconic first use of SteadyCam, The Shining racks up the scares psychologically, and to great effect.

4. Full Metal Jacket (1987)
Produced, directed, and co-written by Kubrick, this film peppers comedy in the mist of The Vietnam War's drama and violence. Experimental in form, it's first section follows Marine training, and traces the descend into madness of one Private because of a severe Drill Instructor. Some say the film loses stature by changing settings in the second half. However, it's just quirky enough to be a Kubrick favorite.

3. Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb (1964)
With lots of help from Peter Sellers, Kubrick highlights the Nuclear Arms Race in yet another anti-war film. However, this one is considered one of the funniest political satires of the 20th century. This movie is elevated by stellar performances, which Kubrick inspired using dubious methods, including sometimes angering actors or saying the take was a rehearsal.

2. 2001: A Space Odyssey (1968)
Sometimes overlooked because of its complexity, this film explores artificial intelligence, evolution, and space travel through a contemplative look at the human experience. It initially received mixed reviews from critics and audiences. However, it later won an Oscar for special effects, and was labeled his generation's bang by Steven Spielberg. Kubrick's groundbreaking efforts and stunning cinematography eventually inspired countless future Science Fiction films as the very definition of awesome.

Here are a few Honorable Mentions:

The Killing (1956)

Fear and Desire (1953)

Killer's Kiss (1955)

1. A Clockwork Orange
Bring on the ultra violence. This story of Alex, his droogs, and their dystopian future has  become a true cult classic thanks to Kubrick's thoroughness. By shooting and re-shooting pivotal scenes, playing with fast and slow motion, using a hand-held camera for most of the shoot, and even throwing his camera out the window, Kubrick brought viewers into this violent world. He also garnered controversy for his efforts.

Agree?

Vatican City Explained

Vatican City: capital of the Catholic church, home to the Pope, owner of an impressive collection of art and history all within the border of the world's smallest country conveniently circumnavigateable on foot in only 40 minutes. So how did the world end up with this tiny nation? The short answer is because: Mussolini and the long answer is very fiendishly complicated so here's a simplified medium* version.

The Popes used rule a nation called the Papal States which covered most of modern-day Italy. It was during this thousand year plus year reign that the Popes constructed St. Peter's Basilica the largest church in the world, and also build a wall around the base of a hill known as Vatican upon which St. Peter stood. The neighboring country known as the Kingdom of Italy thought Rome would make an awesome capital for its country, and so conquered the Papal States. While his nation was being destroyed, the Pope hid behind the walls of Vatican and conflictingly refused to acknowledge that the Kingdom of Italy existed while simultaneously complaining about being a prisoner of the Kingdom of Italy which according to him didn't exist. Rather than risk religious civil war by getting rid of the Pope, the Kingdom of Italy decided to wait him out assuming he'd eventually give up. However, 5 Popes and 60 years later nothing had changed. Which now brings us to Benito Mussolini the then Prime Minister of Italy. He was tired of listening to the Pope complain to Italian Catholics about his self-imposed imprisonment, so Mussolini thought he could score some political points by striking a deal. It went something like this: 1. Italy gave the land of Vatican to the Pope, and 2. Italy gave the Pope a bunch of apology money. In return the pope acknowledged that Italy existed, and the Pope promised to remain neutral in politics and war. Just in case Mussolini decides to side with Hitler; which he did. The deal was signed and Vatican City was born.

Today the tiny nation on a hill has all the things you'd expect of a country. It has its own government that makes its own laws that are enforced by its own police that puts people who break them in its own jail. It also has its own bank, prints its own stamps, and issues its own license plates (though only its citizens can drive within its borders (primarily because of the terrible, terrible parking)), and as the true mark of any self-respecting nation its own top-level domain: .va. Despite these aspects, Vatican City isn't like any other country.

Hold on to your papal hat because it's about to get weird.

To really understand the Vatican there are 2 people and 2 things you need to know: the famous Pope, the incredibly confusing Holy See, the country of Vatican City, and the almost completely unknown King of Vatican City.

But first, the Pope who gets a throne to sit upon and from which he acts as the Bishop for all Catholics in Rome. All bishops in the Catholic Church have thrones, but because the Bishop of Rome is also the Pope his throne is special and has its own special name: The Holy See. Every time a Pope dies or retires there is a sort of game of thrones to see which of the bishops get to occupy the Holy See. While Popes come and go, the throne is eternal. As such the name Holy See not only refers to the throne, but also all the rules that make the Catholic Church the Catholic Church. When Mussolini crafted the treaty he actually gave the land of Vatican to the Holy See. Believe it or not the Holy See is a legal corporate person in international law. Basically every time you hear Holy See think Catholic Church, Inc of which the Pope is the CEO.

Now back to the King. The King of Vatican City has absolute unchecked power within the country's borders. His presence makes Vatican City one of only six remaining absolute monarchies left in the world including: Brunei, Oman, Qatar, Saudi Arabia, and Swaziland. The King's absolute power is why Vatican City can't join the European Union because only democracies are allowed. Though Vatican City does have a legislative branch of government staffed by cardinals appointed by the Pope, the king can overrule their decisions at any time for any reason. So why do you never hear about the King of Vatican City? Because though king and Pope are two different roles, they just so happen to be occupied by the same person at the same time. It has the funny consequence that because the Pope is elected and the king is all powerful, but they're the same guy, It makes Vatican City the world's only Elected Non-Hereditary Absolute Monarchy. it's this dual role that makes untangling Vatican City so difficult because the Pope (depending on the situation) acts either as the king of the country of Vatican City, or the Pope of the Holy See.

Got it? No? Okay time for an analogy. Imagine if a powerful international company (say Kiker Industries) had a CEO who convinced the United States to give one of its islands to the company which then made the island into a new country. The country would be named Kikertropolis and would have an absolute monarchy as its government and a law that made the king by definition the CEO of the company. It's pretty obvious at this point that the CEO should move its corporate headquarters to the new nation so that the laws of the country can benefit the company and the company's global reach can benefit the country. As for the man in the middle, sometimes it's good to be the CEO and sometimes it's good to be the king.

That is essentially Vatican City, but if you're still confused don't worry. Even other countries can't keep it straight. For example the United Nations has the Holy See as a member, but not Vatican City the actual country. The Holy see also gives passports to its citizens that other countries accept even though the passports come from a company, not a country.

Speaking of Vatican City citizens, they are perhaps the strangest consequence of the Pope's dual role as a religious leader and monarch. While other countries admit new citizens with the ever so popular process of human reproduction, Vatican City does not. No one in Vatican City is born a citizen. The only way to become a citizen is for the king to appoint you as one. The king only appoints you as citizen if you work for the Pope who is also the king. Because the king is all powerful, your citizenship is at his whim. If you quit your job for the Pope, the king (who is also the Pope) will revoke your citizenship. These rules mean that Vatican City doesn't have a real permanent population to speak of . There are about 500 citizens; which is fewer people than my high school graduating class. All citizens work for the Pope as either cardinals, or diplomats, or Swiss Guards, or other Catholic related jobs.

So it's best to think of Vatican City as a sovereign corporate headquarters that grants temporary citizenship to its managers rather than a real city state like Singapore which has a self reproducing population of citizens that engage in a variety of economic activity; both of which Vatican City lacks.

But in the end the reason the world cares about Vatican City is not because of the citizens within its walls, but because of the billion members of its church outside of those walls.